We often find that people have some questions about our family. Here are some answers:


Q: Who is everyone?

Essie: Mama, writer, and maker. I like rain, folk music, paper, and shiny things. I dislike neon colours, the patriarchy, and eggplant.

SJ: Working mummy, teacher, and baker. She likes school fetes, reality television, and ice hockey. She dislikes cookbooks without pictures, juice with banana in it, and talking on the telephone.

Arty: Firstborn son, apple of eye, joy of heart. He likes ballet, reading, and sushi. He dislikes rule-breaking, loud noises, and cabbage.

Q: Are you a same-sex couple, and is Arty your son?

A: Yes, and yes! SJ and I met as undergraduates at uni. We got together in 2004, and have been loving each other ever since. Arty completed our family in 2012.

Q: How did you guys have a kid?

A: Arty was conceived with the help of a known donor by home insemination. It was very low-tech, and low-intervention, which was what we wanted.

Q: Who is Arty’s mother?

A: We both are. We both made the conscious decision to welcome a baby into our lives, we both participated in the conception process. I carried him, and SJ supported me through the pregnancy. We were both there when he was born, we are both on his birth certificate, and we have both been parenting him for his whole life.

Q: Who is Arty’s father?

A: He doesn’t have one. He had a donor who helped us make him, and he understands the difference between a donor and a parent.

Q: What does Arty call you?

A: He calls me Mama, and SJ Mummy. He picked up the distinction very early and there’s been no confusion about it. He is very diligent about correcting people who get us mixed up.

Q: Are you guys married?

A: We are getting married in July 2018, after a very long battle for marriage equality here in Australia. We are incredibly excited, and so, so happy!